Friday, July 13, 2007

Today, Everything Changed


That's right.

No need to adjust your screen.



Some thought it was impossible. But it's been done. The most prestigious sporting record in all of recorded human history has fallen. Hard.

The Speed NAFTA record of 24 was absolutely crushed today. It is a day that will live in infamy and forever be associated with the upper-most reaches of the possibilities of human achievement.

Friday, July 13, 2007.

The new Speed NAFTA record is 26.

"Everything happened so quickly," said Bob Nerple, NAFTA spokesman. "Two figures appeared out of nowhere with two Nerf-style footballs of different sizes in hand. After a brief stretching routine, which could only be described as 'majestic' they began the most amazing display of athletic prowess I have ever witnessed."

"Their arms were a blur. No one knew where one Nerf-style football ended and the other began. It was as if time stood still - and yet moved faster than I ever thought possible."

The team disappeared as quickly as they came. But just before departing, they chanted the NAFTA creed:

"Some see the Speed NAFTA record as it is and ask, 'why?' Others dream of Speed NAFTA records that never were and ask, 'why not?' But true NAFTAphiles don't ask questions. They play NAFTA."

1 comment:

D said...

Sadly, they haven't yet added this to the schoolbooks (I checked with my little sister and she didn't recall ANYTHING about NAFTA)... yet another failure in our educational system.